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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23627971">"Can I ask you a question?"</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/caelestislux/pseuds/caelestislux'>caelestislux</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Miraculous Ladybug</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anxiety, Episode: s02 Reverser, Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M, One Shot, Social Anxiety</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 18:20:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,099</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23627971</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/caelestislux/pseuds/caelestislux</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events of Reverser, Marc and Nathaniel are happy to work together on their comic book. But having a rough start between the two of them is a breeding ground for insecurity, not to mention both of their growing anxieties that they're not the right person for the other. And then there's Nathaniel's crush on Marc that he's absolutely sure won't be reciprocated...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Marc Anciel &amp; Nathaniel Kurtzberg, Marc Anciel/Nathaniel Kurtzberg</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>144</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>MarcNath Fics!</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>"Can I ask you a question?"</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Hey.” Nathaniel tapped Marc on the shoulder. “Can I ask you a question?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was a question that had been building up for a long time, festering and growing until it was impossible to ignore any longer. Nathaniel wanted to ask so badly, but he didn’t want to hear one of the two possible answers. Which was selfish, he knew that, and he definitely wanted Marc to be honest with him. But he feared the worst.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Marc turned. Dear god, his eyes were so bright and innocent. A couple of hairs were in his face, and Nathaniel would’ve given anything to push them out of the way. But he knew getting any closer would physically hurt. His heart pounded. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Silence filled the room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nathaniel clutched his shaking hand within the other one. If he didn’t say anything, it would get awkward, but if he </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> say something . . . no, he had to. It’d feel like the final mark of condemnation on their relationship if he didn’t ask. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you upset with me?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“About . . . ?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He had to explain? If he were Marc, he’d be thinking about it all the time, unable to focus on anything the two of them did together. But wait, wasn’t he already doing that? Every time he texted Marc, his brain filled with both serotonin and the overwhelming thought that he wasn’t good enough or that Marc secretly found him despicable. And he was! He wasn’t a good person, he was sure of that. Terrible people got others akumatized.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He’d thought this over so many times that it was like reciting something he’d memorized. He was akumatized because of Chloe, as had so many others. She made fun of him and his crush, which was something that he’d always been sensitive about, and after being openly mocked about his feelings, he was forced to work for Hawkmoth for a whole day, which was far longer than many others. His parents had been worried sick when he didn’t come home, and even more worried when they saw the news broadcast about the red-haired artist villain, which they of course immediately realized was him. And on top of being humiliated in front of his class, coerced into a partnership with Hawkmoth, and upsetting his parents, he’d nearly tried to kill Chloe, Chat Noir, and worst of all, Marinette. He was shocked she still wanted to be his friend after all he’d done.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Those were things that bad people did.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sure, akumatized victims didn’t remember much of what they did when akumatized, and they often acted on impulses they never would otherwise, but still . . . there were few other villains who actively tried to kill people. And via flying blades, of all things. That was one thing Nathaniel remembered, which caused him to actively avoid buzzsaw blades when he could.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Marc said he knew about what had happened when Nathaniel was the Evillustrator. He said he’d seen the broadcast, then saw all of Nathaniel’s drawings on the school website, which is what inspired him to start writing what he did. And sure, it was a great little coping mechanism, making his villain form into a hero and getting the girl of his dreams. But it was nothing more than a power fantasy. Ladybug never noticed him beyond the few times she’d saved him from danger. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>So Nathaniel wasn’t going to get the girl, obviously. And instead, the </span>
  <em>
    <span>guy</span>
  </em>
  <span> of his dreams was right in front of him, sharing his work that was inspired by Nathaniel’s. Yes, an incredibly cute guy with gorgeous eyes and an unmatched talent in the written word who seemed like Nathaniel’s exact match. And what did Nathaniel do? He ripped the journal in Marc’s face and left him crying his heart out. Thankfully it had all worked out, but what if it hadn’t? What if Reverser had won? What if Hawkmoth had stolen the miraculouses and used them to end the world or whatever? What would’ve happened to Marc? Would he have remained Reverser forever, or would Nathaniel have to apologize as the world burned? What if Nathaniel had been reversed into a mindless zombie willing to do whatever Reverser wanted? Would he have deserved it?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And yet . . .</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That didn’t happen. Marc didn’t pretend nothing happened, of course, but he also didn’t seem angry. Just sad and uncomfortable. Drawing into himself and refusing to speak for a while. Even as Nathaniel walked him home and apologized multiple times, Marc gave very small answers with a stilted voice barely higher than a whisper. “Thank you”, “I’m not upset”, “I forgive you”, those kinds of answers. And Nathaniel understood. Marc needed space to process everything. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It took a few days before the two of them were comfortable enough to hold a proper conversation, and when they finally did, Marc didn’t talk about any of it. He just talked about the comic, which was the only time he didn’t seem totally out of place and uncomfortable. Any other topic, even when Nathaniel suggested they add Reverser to the comic, Marc would blush and stammer and act like he was a burden just by existing and being there. Which wasn’t true at all! He clearly didn’t know how appreciated he was, how much Nathaniel truly and deeply wished he could change the past.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Which is what led to the question. Was Marc still upset? Was he only working with Nathaniel to have an artist on his team? Was that why he acted like he wanted to get up and run away at any given moment? Did he secretly hate Nathaniel? It would be heartbreaking to hear, but if it was the truth . . .</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nathaniel blinked, coming back to the present. “About the fact that I ripped your journal and made you cry. Are you upset with me about that?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, of course not. Why?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No? Are you sure?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not upset with you, Nath. It was just a miscommunication.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And with that, Marc turned back to the page he was writing. Nathaniel watched over his shoulder, feeling too strange internally to go back to drawing. The writer finished a line and moved his hand to the next one, smearing the ink slightly. He looped the letters he wrote in cursive, making his document look less like the story to a comic and more like a fancy official decree. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Marc.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He looked back at Nathaniel again, this time more concerned than interested. “What?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Immediately Nathaniel regretted saying anything the second time. He’d always been hyper-aware of the fact that the more he asked something, the more annoying it would become, even if he didn’t believe the first answer. But he had to ask. “You really aren’t upset with me?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No! I couldn’t be upset with you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That was definitely not the expected answer. “Really? I did the unthinkable and you acted like it was nothing. I still don’t cross paths with Chloe because of what she did that akumatized me, but you treat me like I’m one of the nicest people you’ve ever met. Yet you still act awkward and uncomfortable around me, and I don’t blame you. I’m sure it’s hard to be around the person that got you akumatized. I’m sorry Marc, you deserve a better artist than me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There. He said it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Marc stared, his eyes as bright as ever, but his expression twisted into something not unlike horror and dismay. He clutched his jacket around himself, looking like he wanted to smother himself in it. “N-no. You deserve a better writer than me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What are you talking about? I-I’ve been horrible to you. You’ve been nothing but nice.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You don’t understand, Nath.” Marc muttered, picking up his tube of lip gloss and reapplying it. Where his lips had been dry a moment before now shimmered a slight pink, and it was pretty. “You don’t understand at all.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Then can you explain? I don’t want to let you down. I know we’re only together because you write and I draw. Why else would you want to spend time with me? I was the reason you were akumatized!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not that! I really like being around you! And Kim got that Syren girl akumatized, right? And they’re together!” As soon as he finished his words, Marc slapped a hand onto his mouth, eyes widened further than they’d been before in shock. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing. It’s nothing.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Marc, please.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Marc slowly uncovered his mouth, looking Nathaniel in the eye until the prolonged eye contact became slightly uncomfortable. Marc seemed to sense the lack of comfort as well, as he immediately averted his eyes and focused his attention on the pen in his hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Finally, he spoke. “Can I ask </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> a question? Do you think I’m weird or annoying or anything like that?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No! Of course I don’t.” Why was he even asking? Nothing Marc did could make Nathaniel hate him. Even if their roles were reversed and Marc was the one who’d ripped Nathaniel’s sketchbook, but then apologized, there was no way Nathaniel would’ve given up on him. Yet Marc still didn’t seem to believe it. Whenever Nathaniel told him that he liked one of the newer written pages of the comic, Marc would turn to him with an expression filled with soft joy and ask if he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>sure</span>
  </em>
  <span> he liked it, then proceed to grin when he was assured of it. “Why?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know. Okay, I do. It’s just—you didn’t like me when we first met, and—I know you like my writing, but I just . . . I just don’t want you to feel uncomfortable being partnered with me? I’m kinda weird . . . I wear makeup and hide under the stairs and—you know what I mean. Just like . . . if you want to find a different writer, that’s okay.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nathaniel could hardly believe the words Marc was saying. Look for a different writer? Oh, if only Marc knew just how lucky Nathaniel felt over getting to work with him. It was the same feeling as when Nathaniel had liked Marinette and he’d just been filled with joy and excitement over getting to be her partner on a school project or something. Except he was working with Marc every day! It felt like a dream, like it couldn’t possibly be the reality he lived in. Of course, Marc didn’t know about Nathaniel’s feelings for him, and he probably didn’t reciprocate. Heck, Marc could be straight for all he knew. But that was fine, being just friends was enough.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No! I mean, I don’t want to find another writer! I want you!” And as Nathaniel spoke, he could feel his cheeks growing hot. Did he really just say that? So much for not sharing his feelings with Marc. “You’re not weird at all, you’re so good at writing, and your makeup is pretty—” Nathaniel cringed even before he finished speaking. Yeah, just digging yourself a deeper hole, Kurtzberg.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And even as he began to worry, Marc’s face flushed a bright red, almost the shade of his hoodie. He began to fidget with one of his gloves, refusing to make eye contact. “You . . . what?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was time. This conversation was already awkward enough, Nathaniel doubted he could make it any more awkward by admitting the truth, but even still, since the opportunity was there . . . he had to say it or else he felt like he’d explode inside. His heart pounded again. He rubbed his hands together, feeling the sweat stick them together ever so slightly. “I . . . uh . . .” Every sound he tried to make came out as a stammer or a half-word. No, no more of that. It had to be said </span>
  <em>
    <span>now</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Marc was looking more uncomfortable by the minute, and with Nathaniel’s luck, Marc would probably end up thinking that Nathaniel didn’t like him or something equally untrue. And then they’d have a repeat miscommunication, the last thing that either of them needed. He just needed to spit it out. “Marc, I really like you and I think I have a crush on you!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Again, the room became totally silent.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>No one moved. Nothing changed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As soon as Nathaniel worked up the courage to look up and meet Marc’s eyes, he nearly dropped his pen in shock. Rather than disbelief and anger, Marc’s expression was one of hope, with slightly watery eyes and his lips parted slightly. He’d stopped messing with his glove and now had dropped his hands to his sides.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Marc barely whispered, “Is this a joke?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That wasn’t a good sign, right? That probably meant that he’d never thought about Nathaniel that way, and now that he did, the entire atmosphere for Marc was now awkward. Nathaniel mentally kicked himself for even saying anything at all. “No, no joke! I’m not really good at saying this kind of thing. But if you don’t like me it’s okay! We can stay friends, I promise. And . . .” His heart sank as he noted Marc’s frozen expression. “And if you don’t want to talk to me anymore, I understand. I won’t bother you after this, I’ll just be glad we got to work together at all.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>What Nathaniel had anticipated was a scathing response, something along the lines of being uninterested and not wanting to work together anymore. He hadn’t expected Marc to reach over and hug him tightly. He wasn’t sure what to make of that reaction, that is, until he heard a soft sobbing sound.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Marc!” Nathaniel exclaimed, pulling away. Sure enough, Marc was crying again, and of course it had been because of something Nathaniel had done. Because he couldn’t seem to do anything right when it came to romance. “Are you okay? Gosh, I’m so sorry I made you cry again, I didn’t mean—”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, no! I’m good!” Marc was quick to reply, wiping his face with his sleeve. “It’s just . . . I like you too, okay? I like you a lot. And I have this whole time. That’s why I get so embarrassed when I’m around you, I don’t want to mess up and make you think I’m weird or annoying or anything. This whole time . . . I just wanted you to like me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nathaniel froze. Time seemed to stand still, with the whole world holding its breath. Only when his pen rolled out of his hand and hit the floor with a thud did he even register where he was. The art room. Working on the comic. Sitting next to Marc Anciel, who’d just admitted that he reciprocated feelings that Nathaniel had hidden for far longer than he wished he had. He didn’t think Nathaniel was a terrible person, he liked him. He didn’t want to leave, he was just insecure. And Nathaniel understood that all too well.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When he was finally able to talk, Nathaniel managed to say, “I </span>
  <em>
    <span>do</span>
  </em>
  <span> like you. I’m so sorry I made you feel like I didn’t. I get really awkward around you too, but—agh.” He buried his face in his hands for a moment before continuing. “You’re just . . . so pretty and nice. I’m so bad with words, sorry . . .”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No! You’re sweet.” Marc averted his eyes again, not due to an uncomfortable atmosphere, but due to pure embarrassment, if the flush on his cheeks was anything to go by. “Thank you! For telling me, that is. I really thought it was just me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nathaniel took a deep, shaky breath. He could feel the air re-enter his lungs, and his hands finally stopped trembling for the first time since he’d started their conversation. His heart rate was still incredibly fast, but that couldn’t be helped. “It’s not just you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They were inches apart now.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As if they could read each other’s minds, both boys reached their hands down, and, after finding the other’s, clasped them together. Marc’s hand was warm and slightly sweaty, both from his leather gloves and from how anxious he was. Nathaniel only held it tighter.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This couldn’t be real, right? It had to be a fantasy. All Nathaniel’s other romance stories were fantasties, figments of his imagination that could never actually happen in the real world. But here was someone who genuinely liked him and wanted to be around him, despite all that had happened between the two of them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Marc began to laugh out of nowhere, biting his lip slightly to keep from being too loud.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re holding my right hand. I can’t write like this.” But he wasn’t upset at all. His eyes, his bright, beautifully green eyes, were lit up again, matching the dorky grin on his face. His cheeks were still tinted pink, matching the gloss on his lips. If Nathaniel could’ve taken a picture to remember how Marc looked then so he could draw him later, he would’ve. He just looked so . . . </span>
  <em>
    <span>Marc</span>
  </em>
  <span>. “But that’s okay. We’ll get the next page done later.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We will.” Nathaniel agreed. His heart was finally slowing down. He took another deep breath, which seemed to calm his nerves entirely. And that gave him the slight push of courage to go a step further. “Hey, I, uh, really want to kiss you. If you’re good with that and it’s not too soon or anything. If not it’s okay! Like I said, I’m really not good at this kind of thing.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Quicker Nathaniel could’ve predicted, Marc leaned forward and their lips met. For a split second, it was slightly awkward, with the two of them struggling to work off each other, but then they both grew comfortable, which caused the two of them to draw even closer. Nathaniel let his eyes close gently and relaxed his shoulders, letting all his worries fade away and be replaced by the simple emotion of joy. Marc seemed to do the same, as Nathaniel could feel his lips form a soft grin.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When they finally broke apart, Marc was laughing a little again, but he was quick to say, “Sorry, I laugh when I’m nervous. I’ve never, uh, kissed anyone before.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Me neither.” Nathaniel confessed. “I’m probably really bad at it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wouldn’t know.” Marc shrugged, letting his hair fall into his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once again, Nathaniel was tempted to push the strands of hair away. Just like before, he usually stopped himself before he did it, mostly due to fear of Marc’s reaction and also his own usually pounding heart. But not today, he told himself. He wasn’t going to fall prey to his own anxieties about his relationship with Marc if he could help it. Ignoring the slight bit of fear that was starting to rise its way up, he reached out his hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And this time, Nathaniel didn’t hesitate. </span>
</p>
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